Let's see here. . . . .
The day I'll never forget was the day the girl who couldn't keep her pants up tried to kill herself.
We were going to class and I remember her being a little odd that day, but what was new we were all odd. We rounded the corner to the class room when she just fell against the wall and slid down like she was butter on a hot roll.
I was a few steps ahead of her, so I ran over to see what was going on. I kept yelling her name I even slapped her in the face a couple of times (man that felt good on so many wrong levels ;-) ) She just would not become coherent enough for me to get anything out of her other than "pills".
The teacher came out into the hall as I was about to go get my car, I was taking her to the ER whether anyone liked it or not. (we'll call him Mr K) Mr K would not let me leave I was fuming mad at him. Finally he told me just to keep calm they were calling 911 to come get her.
Well the paramedics show up and it is none other than some really good parents of some students we know. The lady had to drive because the dad wasn't going to let the girl who couldn't keep her pants up out of his sight. I rode in the front (hey I just remembered that. I had been in ambulance before my first journey in the back.... I'm such an idiot) and we got the ER. They kept asking me all kinds of questions to which I had no answers. I could tell them was "pills".
Her mom came in and asked what was going on, again all I could say was "pills" (is there a shruggy dude on this thing?) . They pumped her stomach and I was taken back to school to get my car by some other friends that had come by after school let out.
She was released to her mom on the condition that she was to be checked into a facility and figure out what was going on with her. She was also diagnosed as anorexic, which by the way, didn't surprise me at all. Everytime you saw her her bones were sticking out.
Turns out, all of this was (yep you guessed it) over a boy. A damned boy. She was with Guy A, well Guy A was with Girl B, C and D and she couldn't handle that. She was obsessed with him. To the point of freaky. She'd drive by his house just to make sure he was home. (is there a shudder dude on this thing?)
Her dad banned the boy from ever coming to the house again, something which in time she would ignore. Yes she was that desperate to have "love" in her life.
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See You Next Time. . . . . .
Perhaps (in response to your response to my comment), as crazy as you make think it, your husband just wanted to be loved too, and through your two's interaction, he knew that you would love him, and it whether your size mattered to him at first or not, he seems to have loved you, from what you say.
Don't look to hard into outward apperances. As your story shows, someone, that too others, appears beautiful on the outside, is very lonely and "ugly" (ugly like ugly ducking ugly, not ugly evil) on the inside.
Perhaps your husband felt that about himself, so he couldn't fault you for your size. It seems that you both found something in each other that you loved. Shouldn't that be all that matters?
Didn't mean to strike a nerve with you.
BTW, I know my husband loves me for me, it's just sometimes with the self-esteem issues I've had and still struggle with, I wonder. But this is the reason for this blog, to hash out issues I have and need comments on.
Me